deadcatwithaflamethrower:

naamahdarling:

deirdre-relatable:

floridaoranges:

vsantangelos:

notsweettea:

profmeowmers:

i’ve found it, the promised land

I’ve been here! There a truck stop and a diner. In the women’s bathroom there’s a fully clothed statue and if you try to pull down the pants, an alarm sounds in the whole diner.

Wtf even is Florida

What the actual hell?

You know you’re a Florida native when that bit about the diner and the pants and the alarm doesn’t even rate the Weirdness Scale.

ash-soka:

super-star-destroyer:

skaletal:

self-critical-automaton:

critical-perspective:

terminallydepraved:

charlesoberonn:

nexya:

I love how humans have literally not changed throughout history like the graffiti from Pompeii has people from hundreds of years ago writing stuff like “Marcus is gay” “I fucked a girl here” “Julius your mum wishes she was with me” and leonardo da vinci’s assistants drew dicks in their notebooks just for the banter and mozart created a piece called “kiss my ass” so when people wish for ‘today’s generation’ to be like ‘how people used to’ then we’re already there buddy we’ve always been

The Hagia Sophia has inscriptions that were considered sacred for centuries until they were deciphered in the 70s to be Nordic runes saying “Halfdan wrote this”

my old english prof told us that theres a cave in Scandinavia where a viking gratified some runes like 14 feet up on the wall and when they finally reached it all it translated into was “this is very high”

Ancient Shitposting

Now on the History Channel

‘People have literally just always been people’ is genuinely my favorite fact about the world

“Times are bad. Children no longer obey their parents, and everyone is writing a book.” – Marcus Tullius Cicero, 106 BC – 43 BC

Common dog names have literally not changed in 3,000 years.

so not nearly as old but, this is a 12th century stave church in lom, norway (one of less than 40 left in the world)

it’s hard to see, but in the top left corner of this photo where the light comes in from the window, there’s a runic inscription

these photos show it more clearly, it’s easier to see in person. so of course one of the people i was travelling with asked what it said, and we were told it basically translates to:

“on this day, I climbed to this point, in the corner of the church”

people really have always been people

errantindy:

everyonelikedbubbahotep:

tuomey:

motomenorahkent:

ghostchibi:

eltigrechico:

tilthat:

TIL that the saxophone was invented only in 1846 by Adolphe Sax. As a child, he survived a three-story fall, a gunpowder explosion, drinking a bowl of sulfuric water, a near-poisoning due to furniture varnish, and falling into a speeding river. His neighbors called him “little Sax, the ghost.”

via reddit.com

God really did not want the Saxophone invented.

perfect timing for this post showing up but Mr. Sax invented a bunch of other instruments (including ones that had a run but didn’t really stick around) but y’all wanna see one of his failed inventions?

behold, the fucking valved trombone

That’s not an instrument, that a section of plumbing

perpendicular honk engine

His mother once said that “he’s a child condemned to misfortune; he won’t live.”

The best part about this story is that Saxe lived from 1814 to 1894 – he died at 80.

I think he just wanted to live to spite the gods, his mother, and music.